Less is more. This can be applied in many areas of life. But this is especially true in the way we interact with kids. I mean, it doesn’t mean you interact less with kids. But if you find yourself you are a lecturing parent who has no set limit on the number of words you use while disciplining kids- pause and think. Does lecturing really work? How do our kids react when we lecture? Chances are they start tuning you out, roll their eyes, and may even repeat the undesired behavior again another day or even worse- they don’t stop doing what they were doing despite the lecture. WHY DO PARENTS LECTURE? Most of the time, parents start lecturing when children make the same mistakes again and again and children do not seem to get “why it is wrong”. And out of frustration, we may believe talking non-stop will help…

Kids are the most curious creatures ever. My 6-year-old can never stop asking questions. Even though sometimes it drives me nuts, I realize it’s a good way to get to know about people and the world we live in. And an amazing way to get to know your kids better is to ask questions to them. I don’t know whether it’s because I have less and less time now to be curious and make questions up, I find a list of good questions to ask kids useful. As part of your daily connection time with kids (if you don’t do it already, I highly recommend it!), I like to take this list and ask funny and thoughtful questions. It always ends in laughter or some light-hearted moments. And the fact is when kids grow up, they might not talk as much as they are now. It might get harder to…

Becoming a parent is a huge milestone in everyone’s life. It changes our life irreversibly. After becoming parents we need to dedicate a lot of time and resources to kids. But does that mean we should lose our sleep over raising kids and hover around them all the time as if our world revolves only around them? Such a way of parenting is called helicopter parenting. The term helicopter parent was coined by Foster Cline and Jim Fay in 1990. Helicopter parents hover around their children like a helicopter, monitoring every move of theirs and giving constant directions on what they can do and what they cannot. Keep reading if you think you exhibit signs of being a helicopter parent and want to know how to stop being a helicopter parent. WHAT CAUSES HELICOPTER PARENTING? Fear. Though there can be various reasons why parents decide to hover over their kids,…

A few months ago, I started noticing how my mental health has been on a decline after having kids. I pondered about it for some days and then I realized why my stress is running high. I was not doing too much for kids. But I was going a bit high on the controlling side. I realized maybe I exhibit some signs of being a helicopter parent. I was constantly worried about things like, if they are having too much screen time, too much junk food, etc, and hovering above them to make sure they are not doing this, that, etc. Then I reached a point where I couldn’t take it anymore and then I realized I am not the only one who is suffering, but my kids too. They want their freedom and I want mine too. Well, sadly, I realized I have a few characteristics of a helicopter…

As parents, we sometimes don’t quite get why we have to repeat certain things to kids a hundred times and they still don’t understand it. We think it is “disobedience” or they are being stubborn. Understanding children’s brain development can help parents to understand the underlying reason behind their behaviors, which will help us to support them and be more empathetic towards them. Approximately 90% of a child’s brain size is developed by age 5. But do you know when a person’s brain becomes fully developed? 25! The brain develops in a back to the front pattern, and the prefrontal cortex which is located in the frontal lobe of the brain is the last one to develop. Recent studies show that an adult thinks with the prefrontal cortex whereas teenagers think with the amygdala. WHAT DOES THE PREFRONTAL CORTEX DO FOR KIDS? The prefrontal cortex, which is situated in the…

Boys don’t cry. It is a common phrase we hear often. But are really boys wired not to cry? Is there something wrong with boys crying? It’s interesting to note that biologically, women are wired to cry more than men. Ad Vingerhoets, Professor of Clinical Psychology (Emotions and Wellbeing), Tilburg University, The Netherlands, is noted for his research on crying. He has spent 20 years studying the topic. According to him, the hormone testosterone plays a role in regulating emotional tears. Testosterone is said to inhibit tears while prolactin, a hormone found in women is said to promote crying. But another study shows that however, in babies and young children no gender differences in crying frequency are found. Frey (1985) has postulated that boys and girls start to diverge in crying with the onset of menses in girls. But according to the study it has less to do with menstruation…